words

     "Life and death are in the hands of the tongue." Every day I realize how true these words are. Words can form poetry  and words can be weapons. A person must be so careful what one says because sometimes as much as one tries to apologize one can't always erase the damage that one's words have incurred. One can apologize but the result is equal to an erased  piece of paper. The words are no longer there but the page is not as flawless as before the eraser was employed.

      There is a flawed saying that it is better to take a chance and apologize if necessary later . Some things are too severe for a mere apology to fix. An apology is always a good start, even if it is not always enough.

sticks and stones will break your bones and so will words

the words one chooses wield  power. they can lift spirits or cut someone to the bone. it is so important to be careful of  the words one uses. words can push others to the brink.... a brink that they would never have reached had the speaker had chosen his speech more carefully.
i never liked the old nursery rhyme about sticks and stones and how supposedly words never hurt. .... i beg to differ. words can hurt even more because they are not a physical object.
use  words to convey love. use words to build world peace. use words to soothe.
never use words to injure or harass.

the weight of the word.

i love when some people just shoot their mouths off without any forethought and then they wonder why everyone is mad at them. why don't they realize that it is so very important to be careful what one says? one may be able to apologize, but one can never really unsay something once its already been  uttered.

vulnerablility

when one gets to know anyone one gets to know their vulnerabilities. this is a good thing as well as a frightening thing. it makes one realize how fragile we humans are and how easily we can hurt each other once we know each others weaknesses. we have to be careful to be sympathetic as opposed to callous.

in the workplace it can be a challenge. some hone in on others vulnerabilities and try to bring them down . its disgusting. i work with people who are a variety of ages and i see it all of the time. i have a supervisor who is sixty who bullies a twenty-something employee because she is sensitive and is young. it makes me ill. why bring someone else down ? so the person can feel suicidal? so the person will end up cold hearted because they cant take it anymore? so this person becomes verbally abusive as well?

i know someone who could be annoying and the first instinct is to be really nasty back. but i try to hold back if i can. this person is sensitive. i know that if i let loose this person would be totally crushed , so i try to find calmer words to confront this person. i know that this is a the better way. the truth is if someone yells at me i have been so desensitized that i don't give that someone any thought. i just figure they are crazy unless i know that i really did something wrong. then i might feel a little guilty. the truth is when someone raises their voice all i can hear is the anger, not their words.

verbal shorthand

the best kinds of relationships are when two people speak the same language so much so that they dont need to finish their sentences when they speak to each other. ive had alot of relationships where the other person THINKS they get what im saying but dont. im not speaking of THOSE types of relationships. im speaking of the type of relationship where two people actually are speaking the same "language" . its so comfortable to have this verbal shorthand. so sad when its over. so hard to rebuild. so worth the effort though. the eternal quest for mutual appreciation and understanding for the essence of another.... the search continues....