Jew in the City Presents "The Sound of Silence" feat. The Maccabeats

  I wasn't sure I was going to like this, but I did. Technology is really taking over and its nice to have Shabbos when we take a break from it all and go back to the old days before smart phones. Heck I have always loved the fact that Shabbos is a phone free zone. 

Brooklyn Half Marathon

    The Brooklyn half marathon was last Shabbos. I don't always know before hand when it will be but when I walk on Ocean Parkway I find out. The runners hit Ocean Parkway at about 9:00 a.m when a lot of people are on their way to shul. Seeing the runners people watch for a few minutes as they go on their way. The cutest thing was when Jewish runners would see us frum people lining Ocean Parkway watching the race. At least 4 different runners wished us good Shabbos. They may have been running in a race, but they remembered it was Shabbos when they saw other Jews. It was really heartwarming to wish them good Shabbos back.

The Constant of Change

   Work can be very stressful. I work with lots of characters . On the weekends I like to spend time with friends and acquaintances minus the  drama. I used to be a Shabbos guest to a family whose resting tone was yelling. After awhile I just could not take it so I stopped visiting them. Other times I have met really rude people at Shabbos meals that I am sure not to attend if I know that  those extremely rude people will be attending. To be fair I have sporadically hosted Shabbos meals which makes things easier since I am in charge of the guest list. Often I am too tired to host a meal even though I enjoy doing so.

     Life is so transient. Friends and neighbors change . People move away. Life situations change. You can think one is set with friends and family and that can all change. I like things to stay the same but the joke is on me. The only thing that is constant is change.
      

Shabbat Shalom

     After a really tough week full of bad news I am wishing everyone a good Shabbos and a better week next week. I am praying for the speedy recovery of Mrs Sassoon and her daughter and for the healing of the entire Sassoon family. I send my condolences to the Sassoon family. I cannot even imagine what kind of pain they are experiencing. To lose one family member is devastating, To lose seven all at once .... Words cannot define...
     Because of this horrific tragedy so many more people know about the laws of not cooking on Shabbos than had before . I realize some people may feel it was more of a chillul hashem than a kiddush hashem, but I think its more of a kiddush hashem. It has opened dialogue that had not been there before. It makes my mad dash home to prepare for the arrival of shabbos more understood by my co-workers. I was fortunate enough to have only been met with good will while discussing this tragedy this week. People of all faiths were so sad to hear of the loss of seven children, especially those who have small children. So sad how sadness often unites people more than joy does.
      Have a good Shabbos full of Shalom and Bracha.

Shabbos

   I am posting these two videos together because they are both Shabbos related.
      Anyways , its interesting to see Paula Abdul embracing her heritage. I do not know if she will become shomer Shabbos, but I think its cool she is giving it a try. I know that those in charge of the Shabbos Project are hoping everyone who makes the effort to keep Shabbos this one Shabbos will continue to do so. I think that it is a wonderful way of raising awareness about Judaism to non- Shabbos observing Jews. I also think that it would be great if reform and conservative synagogues would promote it as well. They would not really be promoting keeping Shabbos as the Shabbos project suggests, but it perhaps it would get some of the Jews who attend their services to become more involved. Though it would be amazing if everyone would be fully shomer Shabbos, everyone is not going to be just because we want them to. Then again there is such thing as baby steps and it is not all or nothing. Just because someone is not completely observant it does not mean they should just throw in the towel as some extremists are so quick to  say. A person has so start somewhere and every mitzvah a person does has value.
      Finally  I will devote a few words to the 'shabbos app' that threatens to invade Shabbos as we know it. I am not so sure it is really halachically correct and if it is it would be more for an emergency or for a medical doctor to use . Even before cell phones and texting people were tempted by not being able to watch a favorite television show. Before vcrs and dvrs people were even more tempted. I equate the Shabbos app to setting the timer of your tv to go off at a certain time so you could watch a show you may miss on Shabbos. Actually, it is probably more permissible to do this than use the Shabbos App.
       Smart phones are a bigger yetzer harah than the internet on the computer ever was because it is so much more accessible. It fits in your pocket and it turns on so easily. It is easy to get attached . I am not as attached to texting perhaps because I was not a teenager when it was created. I can see how you can get attached to it since its on a cell phone and one can stay connected all of the time. I of course resisted getting a cell phone when it first came out for that very reason. I don't really want to be that accessible to others. Call me anti-social, I do not care. I do have a smart phone now and I use it often and find it a necessity, but my ablility to be off the radar is missed with all this wireless connectivity.
        Whenever there is new technology, there are pros and cons about  it. I like Shabbos because I am able to turn off technology. Its not that I do not have a yetzer harah to want to be connected to technology during Shabbos, but the rested feeling I have after Shabbos because I was forced to find other ways to amuse myself and I was able to turn inward and reconnect with friends would not be possible if I did keep my smartphone on or any other mode of technology. Its so nice to be able to have an actual conversation with people without them looking downward to check their phone, without them taking a call, without the blare of the televison or radio. I want the Shabbos smart phone cover that says MUKTZAH on it  in fuschia  to thwart any temptation of using it on Shabbos. Even if the Shabbos app is permissible I do not think that it is in the spirit of shabbos and I think that its only really ok in an emergency.But thats just me. 

Miracles

A rocket hits a gas station but does not blow up because they had a tank of benzine which is less likely to blow up than just gas. They were able to cool both tanks quickly so they did not explode. It is truly a miracle.
   Have a good Shabbos. Let there be peace in Israel.  . 

Touro College Sues State Agency Over Right To Sabbath Elevator For Students | The Jewish Week

Touro College Sues State Agency Over Right To Sabbath Elevator For Students | The Jewish Week
This article is very interesting. When I lived in the Touro dormitory there wasn't a shabbos elevator and one year I lived on the tenth floor. We would trek up and down the stairs during shabbos. I think that the request for a shabbos elevator is legitimate . When I was in college I had been in an accident and was not able to walk down stairs for a few months. It would have been nicer for me had their been  a shabbos elevator.  I don't know what floors they live on but I do find it anti frum for the board of the building to oppose the shabbos elevator. It isn't necessary to have one, but it does help. I don't think that for one day of the week that it is so awful for someone who does not keep shabbos to endure if it would make things a lot easier for others. To be fair I do not know all of the issues in this case. This is just my two cents.

Shabbat Shalom

     Though I sometimes feel the crunch before shabbos and miss technology during shabbos, I am enjoy observing shabbos. I LOVE not being able to answer the phone on shabbos. I love being able to read and sleep for one day a week every week and not feel like I should be doing something else more productive. My world is so fast paced that if I was not forced to take a break each week due to shabbos observance I might not take a break. Its exhausting just contemplating such a notion. I am so looking forward to relaxing this shabbos. Have a fabulous shabbos everyone.

Have A Good Shabbos

     Wishing everyone a good shabbos with a pre shabbos video.

The Importance Of Embarrassing Moments

       There are often a variety of characters at the shabbos table when one is invited for a shabbos meal. I always make an effort to be cordial  to everyone . This week was no different.
         Today I wore a silver pendant with a white shirt . When I got home I saw that the silver pendant had really needed to be polished before wearing and that the silver stained my white shirt . Chances are at some point during my shabbos lunch meal , my pendant moved and the stain under the pendant was visible. I was glad that I had not been aware of this at the meal because I would have been really embarrassed. Short of putting on my coat there would not have been anything I could have done about it .
           The first thing I thought about after noticing the stain was whether or not I had acted rude, impolite or condescending toward anyone. If I had then I would have been really embarrassed.. The only thing more embarrassing than having a stain on your shirt is being a arrogant and having a stain on your shirt. Fortunately all I had was a stain on my shirt.
  

Have A Good Shabbos

 Have a great Pre-Pesach Shabbos.

shabbos

     Often people who do not keep shabbos think that it is a big hassle of don'ts. You can't go on the computer, you can't watch tv, you can't speak on the phone or text. I am so very happy that there is one day of the week when I can't make or receive phone calls or e-mails. It is such a welcome break. I can't answer the phone so no one can think that I am ignoring them.
      Have a good shabbos everyone.

shabbos menucha?

by friday i am always exhausted from a busy week at work. i am always looking forward to a restful , sleep filled shabbos. when i did not work on fridays i found shabbos to be must more enjoyable because i was able to rest up on friday before all  the festivities .
every friday  i make the mad dash home before shabbos so i can prepare for shabbos. this is especially difficult because all i ever want to do when i get home from work is sleep for a few hours, but on friday i must shower , prepare / heat up food and make sure everything is ready for the impending shabbos. now that shabbos  starts a little later its a little easier, but i am still stressed.
sometimes i am invited out for friday night dinner which is nice but delays my shabbos rest. other times i eat dinner at home and go to an oneg at someone's home. this is a little more restful because i always manage to sleep a bit before joining the festivities.
i try to get 7-8 hours of sleep friday night before waking up on shabbos morning. if i am home for friday night dinner it is easier to wake up early on shabbos morning and read a little bit before going to shul . if i have lunch plans it is nice but with these short shabboses i am assured little or no shabbat nap or i am graced with a nap that starts on shabbos and ends motzei shabbos. i find it slightly unsettling to wake up motzei shabbos.
sometimes when i eat shabbos lunch at home there are afternoon get togethers which last until havdalah.

the shabbat socializing is amazing for the soul. to be alone on shabbos is the worst. after a grueling week of work a social shabbos really helps me decompress. it really isn't shabbos menucha. it is  just a rest from the work week  schedule.

shabbat shalom

every week i vow to get more sleep and every week it is the same. i do not get enough sleep. the weekend is almost here and  i do not have many weekend plans so my sleep debt will go down . have a good shabbos everyone. zzzz....zzzz....

perverse eating habits

have you ever had desert at shabbos lunch and felt that the hostess enjoyed watching you eat the dessert more than you enjoyed actually eating the dessert? usually the hostess is a size two and is eating two bites of some gross looking diet dessert  as she is forcing everyone else at the table to eat whatever cake / cookie/ mousse/ pareve ice cream that she has served. it goes beyond the stereotypical jewish mother syndrome. these women have forbidden themselves to eat sweets so they feel that by watching someone else eat decadently they will vicariously be eating the sweets. its kind of like if there is some delicious looking treif treat at work  and you watch someone else enjoy it because you can't, except its worse because these women could really eat these desserts they just won't because by eating desert they will risk a fate worse than death . they risk becoming a size four.
i of course can't stand this type of food pusher because they make me feel like they think im fat so they want to make sure i have dessert but of course they are so skinny  they don't need dessert. if they didn't enjoy watching everyone at the table eat the dessert i might actually believe them.

shabbos yom menucha

people who do not keep shabbos always revel at how i am able go 25 hours without being able to text, speak on the phone , watch tv or go veg out on the computer. i say how can i not have a 25 hour period each week with such restrictions?   bring it on!! being restricted from the possibility of a 2 hour phone call is divine. im so hypnotized by my computer that its good to have at 25 hour weekly break from it. oh and i don't watch enough tv to miss it on shabbos. im not such a heavy texter so i don't even think about not being able to text on shabbos.
i feel sorry for heavy texters . for them its as addictive as smoking. they can barely go fifteen minutes  without increasing the intensity of their carpal tunnel. they have to learn the art of face to face conversation . what a bummer.
 i think that hashem knew what he was doing when he banned electronic devices on shabbos. he knew  that we needed a weekly break from it all so we would actually have shabbos menucha.

insecurities

when i was in my twenties i recall being a regular shabbos guest at a particular family's house. the wife was in her early thirties and the couple had five children. i had a friend who used to sometimes join me when i went for a shabbos meal at this family's home. my friend was in her early thirties and never married. once i when i was visiting this family without my friend and  the wife told me that she felt uncomfortable having my friend over because they were the same age and  that my friend was single and childless. it was an honest reaction but at the time i was taken aback. my friend should have been the one feeling uncomfortable but she was not. i think a lot of times the haves feel more uncomfortable about having than the have nots feel about not having.
several years later when i was in my late twenties, early thirties i remember visiting a former childhood friend who had been married for ten years and had five or six kids. when i went to visit her i remember feeling ignored. i didn't say anything because i just figured she was very busy with her kids and that sometimes its hard to concentrate on a guest with so many little kids  around. i also figured that i wouldn't be  visiting again any time soon because she seemed too busy to have guests. when she drove me to the monsey  bus stop  motzei shabbos on her own she apologized for not spending enough time with me during my visit. years later i visited this same friend in monsey and though she had some small children at the time her other children were older. i think that by then she adjusted to juggling her kids and having guests. this of course is quite a difficult task.
i realize that my being single can make people uncomfortable. even as a younger single it made my married friends feel uncomfortable which i thought was quite odd. in my twenties i always had the attitude that my bashert must be right around the corner and i wasn't worried about possibly always being the odd woman out.  i think that many people who are married with children unconsciously do this to singles. i think its because they feel bad for us and they don't quite understand it. unfortunately sometimes it makes them feel so bad that they don't want us around. which makes the situation worse . who wants to be excluded on the basis of one's lack of marital status?
i have a friend whose husband had cancer . he went out of his way to make sure people felt comfortable around him when really it should have been the other way around. people should have made sure to make him feel comfortable . after all  , he was the one with cancer.
i had a friend who would hesitate to tell their childless friends about her children because she thought that it would make them feel bad. personally i think they were just thinking of themselves. it made them feel uncomfortable that their friends did not have kids. well, no one wants to be the one that everyone is afraid to talk about  husbands or kids with. it makes a person feel even more left out . yes it does feel bad that others are fortunate and have families. it feels even worse to be the one everyone walks on egg shells around. there is always something someone else has that another would like to have. its far better to concentrate on what we all have in common than on what others lack.

shabbat shalom

usually when goyim at work wish me a merry x-mas even when they know darn well im not celebrating their holiday it gets a bit awkward and i say thanks, ill have a nice day but its not my holiday. some goyim just can't comprehend how someone would not be celebrating x-mas. this year its  a bit unusual because although december 25  is not x-mas or chanukah  for a jew it is shabbos which actually is a holiday.hmmm.
to all of the yidden reading this blog have a shabbat shalom!!

shabbos plans

every friday i hear the same question. "so what are you doing for shabbos?" sounds innocuous , right.? well sort of . the thing is as much as i like to go away for shabbos and visit friends, my most favorite thing is staying home for shabbos . this doesn't mean that i stay in my apartment like a hermit, just means i get to stay home and sleep in my own bed. i have friends over for a meal or go out for meals. i usually go to shul and later in the day sit on the benches on ocean parkway. i always make time for reading and a nice sized nap. if i go away for shabbos im on somebody else's schedule. for meals im at somebody else's mercy. usually when i go out for a meal when im home in brooklyn it doesn't matter what is on the menu. if the food is not plentiful i know that when i go home i will be able to refuel with my own food.
even if when i go away to a good friends for shabbos i still feel like i have lost  my weekend. even if i have a good time. when i go away for shabbos i lose that time of the week when im in charge of the day's agenda.

nissan

its not nissan yet, but i decided to write this post anyway. this is a post about a company named nissan that makes the best thermoses around. let me explain. i used to have a hot water urn in my old apartment that i would use on shabbos. when i moved into my current apartment, the urn did not fit anywhere so i got rid of it. my current apartment is as hot as mexico year round so keeping the stove on with a blech is out as well. so for several years i havent had any shabbos morning coffee. until recently that is ...

i recently bought a rockin' thermos by a company called nissan. the thermos keeps liquids piping hot for 24 hours! no exaggeration! now i dont have caffeine withdrawal on shabbos morning and all is right with the world.