Spin the Egg

     There are two events that if I wanted to I could attend almost every night of the week and they are shiva and singles events, not necessarily in that order. I am not sure why that is, but trust me it is. I am sure that there are gold diggers who pay shiva calls to find shidduchim. Shiva houses are full of lonely people . Death makes people want to strengthen interpersonal relationships because  one never knows just how long one has on this earth so its imperative to pair up as soon as you leave the mourners home.
    Singles events can sometimes make one feel as somber as a house full of mourners. They can certainly be depressing. Not unlike avelus. Singles events can definitely make one contemplate life and how one is afraid one may have to live life singularly , without a spouse because these singles events can make the possibility of finding a spouse seem so bleak.
     Singles events and shiva  go together like egg whites and yolk.

Shiva

     I just got back from a shiva call. My friend's younger brother passed away. I did not know him well, but he was a lovely person. I feel so sad for my friend and her family. Shiva calls always make me introspective. It makes me contemplate the meaning of life. A friend or loved one could go at any time. It is so important to spend as much time as possible with them and always make sure they know how much you care for them. Life is unpredictable and relationships are what make life worth living.

Shiva - To go or Not to go

      If a person wanted to he or she could make a shiva call every night of the week. One would have to be rather depressed to actually do this. Making a shiva call is a big mitzvah, but sometimes when I make one I feel like I would have been better off staying at home.  After going to several shiva houses for people I did not know well I have come to the conclusion that unless you knew the deceased well or the people sitting shiva well it is better to send a condolence card .
      

Shiva

     At the risk of sounding extremely depressed I present this post. A childhood friend's father passed away this week. It turns out that his yartzeit will be the day before my dad's. He was the same age my dad was when he died.
      Though a funeral may be held during a chag , shiva is observed after the holiday. This is something many people do not know. This is something that I know and will always remember, because my dad passed away during pesach three years ago. Its kind of like having extra shiva because though its not officially shiva, one is already in mourning. 

shiva

     I went to the Shiva for my neighbor's baby tonight. I always wonder if I am helping or hurting when I attend Shiva. It was  hard not  to cry. I know that I wear my emotions on my face.   I am not even really close friends with my neighbors . I had never even been in their apartment before.  The aura in the room was  thick with sadness. You would have to be a stone not to feel their pain. A child is not suppose to pass away before a parent, especially one that never got to live through even one season.
     I believe that however sad this is that it was meant to be this way. We just do not understand why. When someone passes so young it makes one  realize that life is finite and that one needs to cherish every moment one spends  with loved ones . When I came home from the Shiva I called my mother.