Thursday, December 30, 2010


i just finished reading the book hush by  a woman whose pseudonym is eishes chayil..i am in awe.
sexual abuse in the clergy is not a new thing especially among the catholics. these issues have only been out in the open in the recent past. sexual abuse of children is not limited to any particular religious group and isnt only something priests do to catholic school children. its an equal opportunity psychological disorder.
 recently chassidishe as well as yeshivish pediphiles have polluted the airwaves with scandal. what had once been taboo to discuss has been blown out of the water. exposing such monsters does not mean that everyone who is chassidishe or yeshivish is a pedophile just like all catholic priests are not pedophiles either. the point of blowing the cover of such scoundrels is to protect the innocent who have been scarred by such monsters and to not let them ever commit such vile acts again.
a woman who calls herself eishes chayil witnessed her childhood friend being molested. she also knew of a boy who had hung himself because he had been molested. the community she grew up in was hush-hush about these events. they didn't want anyone to know lest it ruin their chances for shidduchim. eishes chayil wanted to wake people up. sexual abuse of  children occurs in every community and must be addressed so there will never be another child  suffering from sexual abuse. eishes chayil succeeds in conveying her message by portraying a multifaceted, loving  and g-d fearing community of chassidim who are a bit too  concerned with being spurned by the community for condemning child molestation and not concerned enough about preventing it in the first place. it might ruin their shidduch chances. it might cause them to be threatened  physically. this type of ignorance must not continue.                                                                             because this is a novel and not just a newspaper article eishes chayil was able to show us the beauty and innocence of a chassidishe lifestyle. chassidim may be much too concerned with what the jones' will say but they are also basically caring people.they  just need to work on this issue.  we don't need any more young men jumping from their hotel windows on their wedding night because they were molested as a children.
there is a reason why the world is more open about psychological disorders. it is so those who chas v'shalom have to endure such atrocities will be able to be helped and so abusers will stop.
when a frum community ignores the cries of those who are molested because it may be lashon hara or because  it could ruin the good name of the molester's family that community is condoning molestation. silence is acquiescence. the torah does not say one should stand idly by while children are abused. that is not torah and it is not frumkeit. it seems the chassidim are more concerned with the good of many rather than the well being of an individual. im not sure why. i know that ive learned in the modern orthodox school that i went to as a child that if you save one person it is as if you have saved an entire world. if one person is murdered it is as if a whole world has been destroyed. is this not a chassidishe or yeshivish concept? i thought that this was what the torah espouses. period.
everyone loses when molestation occurs . the victim as well as all of their friends and family.
thank you eishes chayil for writing this tenderly  written  book about such a grievous issue. if it will help but  one child be safe it will have been successful.  may this book protect  us all.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

text me!!

in the old days when i would call in sick to work i would have to call my supervisor and break the news. my supervisor is not a   morning person.  the most awful thing in the world would be hearing her voice when i would call in sick.
now the new generation has arrived at work. all members of the new generation would text my supervisor instead of actually speaking  to her. at first i didn't want to give my supervisor my cell number because id rather  not  have her be able to call me anywhere .  now she does have my cell number so i have been able to make the most of a bad situation. i had to call out from work yesterday due to the blizzard . i texted her. it was amazing. even when she texted me back with an annoying request it was still way better than hearing her awful voice utter those words.
i am just loving technology. i guess im now officially part of the new generation.

Monday, December 27, 2010

snow day

new york city has been hit by 2 feet of snow. its so bad that none of the subway trains are running and they actually announced it on the radio and it was actually posted on the new york transit authority's website. usually the new york transit authority website lies and says the trains are running but they really are not. this time they were truthful. it was that bad.
i grew up in the the midwest  and we didnt even drive in this kind of weather because its that bad.
stay warm everybody and don't be dumb enough to go out in the snow until the trains are running and the roads are clear.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

duds not dudes

i don't have any idea how people actually meet and get married and stay married . to me it seems impossible and yet some manage to actually do this. i must be missing something.  i actually had two dates this week with two different guys. they weren't even what i would consider the bottom of the barrel but i would rather eat black snow than spend another evening with either fellow.
one guy looked a lot older than his photo which though superficial  i do find to be a deal breaker. i think he may even have had a visible cataract in one eye.  i really don't like the old look.  sorry. the other guy looked young but could not go more than two paragraphs without saying a d'var torah. this isn't a bad thing, but its not the type of guy im looking for either.
perhaps this is all that is out there. lord knows i have looked. i don't want to be alone, but i definitely don't want to be alone with these shlemiels either.

Friday, December 24, 2010

shabbat shalom

usually when goyim at work wish me a merry x-mas even when they know darn well im not celebrating their holiday it gets a bit awkward and i say thanks, ill have a nice day but its not my holiday. some goyim just can't comprehend how someone would not be celebrating x-mas. this year its  a bit unusual because although december 25  is not x-mas or chanukah  for a jew it is shabbos which actually is a holiday.hmmm.
to all of the yidden reading this blog have a shabbat shalom!!

Monday, December 20, 2010

vintage trains

all through december at specified times on sundays the m train has been running vintage subway trains courtesy of the new york transit museum. yesterday i rode the vintage train from second avenue on the lower east side  to queens plaza. it was so much fun. as wretched as the trains are in 2010 they are still way better than they were seventy years ago!
the vintage train i rode yesterday was a mishmash of train cars from the thirties to the sixties all connected to form one short train. there were also people dressed up to be 1940's era passengers . even the conductor was wearing a vintage conductor's outfit.
the subway cars had vintage ads on them that were awfully fun to read as well.
the new york transit museum normally houses this and many other vintage subway trains. what makes this event unique is that one is able to actually ride a vintage train.
the last vintage subway jaunt will be next sunday. if you are in nyc check it out. if not there is always next year....!

Saturday, December 18, 2010

the wind

every so often i meet a guy who is as tangible as the wind. he touches my heart with the power of the wind and is just  as difficult to hold onto. let me explain. some guys act like they are here to stay but really aren't. just when i start thinking they will really be there for me they aren't. just like the wind. they think they might want to be with me but really they want to leave me with a chill. they can't be the one because their feelings about me are just as fleeting as the summer breeze. you feel the breeze but you cant touch it. i try not to let the wind fool me, but sometimes its hard not to want to believe that the  smarting tears the wind emotes from my eyes are for someone more visible than kramer's invisible glass coffee table.
i like cold weather, but i have never liked the wind.

Friday, December 17, 2010

16mm home movies of jewish visitors to poland in the 1930's

i went to the center for jewish history today and saw a most interesting exhibit. i saw the exhibit called 16mm postcards: home movies of  jewish visitors to poland in the 1930's.  it was a moving homage to those who lived in pre-war poland. americans who had been born in poland returned there and took home movies.  since these were home movies the camera subjects were mugging for the camera. it was amazing. it really caught their spirit. it was nice to see pre war poland caught on film with people living their normal lives.
one of the home movies was narrated by two holocaust survivors  circa 1982. these survivors had grown up in the town that was filmed. it  was moving to watch them pick out there friends and themselves in the footage.
it is important to realize how vibrant those who were murdered  were  before the holocaust .
this exhibit will be at the center for jewish hitory on 16th street in manhattan through the beginning of january. it is well worth viewing.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

don't let the bedbugs bite!

when i came to new york my biggest fear was going on the subway and picking up head lice. b"h that has not happened . now the biggest fear amongst my friends is bedbugs. some even go so far as to say that they will only go to the movie theater if they sit on a plastic bag. what about the subway? will they sit on a plastic bag when they go on the subway? what about restaurants? will they sit on a plastic bag at a restaurant?
i work in a public place and i dont have a plastic bag attached to my backside for when i decide to sit down (which isn't often because i mostly stand at work , but this is besides the point) . lol. i sit down on my seat at the movies sans plastic bag as well. bedbugs and head lice be damned.
bedbugs aren't cancer and they aren't aids !!! bedbugs are a nuisance and i certainly don't want any but im not going to let the mere thought of one ruin my life.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010


babies are so cute. every person in the world once was a baby. so innocent. so full of hope. when i look at someone with poor character i find it hard to believe that they were once a cute little baby .
when does it happen? when does the cute little baby turn into the bad seed?
changes. they boggle the mind..

Monday, December 6, 2010

i told you so

yeah i know that this isn't a chanukiah but i liked the picture so thought id sneak it on this post.
a few months ago i had a friend who was about to do a very stupid thing. my other friends and i warned her against doing this very stupid thing yet she did it anyway. now the you know what has hit the fan and i feel bad for her even though she did this stupid thing  knowing full well  the repercussions. i still feel bad for her . i wish i could have influenced her not to do this stupid thing. but at least i can rest a little easier because i had tried to warn her,
it never feels good to be able to say i told you so.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

latkes vs sufganiot

its taken me awhile to accept the fact that sufganiot are a part of chanukah. for me latkes have always represented chanukah while sufganiot were the weak alternative , especially since i dont particularly like jelly donuts in the first place. okay thats it. i dont especially like the taste of a jelly donut so i dont understand why it has to share an equal  headline as  THE chanukah food . i realise the reason any food is a chanukah food is because its fried, but really now. don't you think a golden brown latke dipped in applesauce or sour cream is much better than a sloppy sweet jelly donut?

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

happy chanukah!

happy chanukah everyone! the photo i have included in this post is a picture of a salvatore dali painting that is on display at the trump/time warner building on 59th st and columbus circle. in fact there is a whole dali exhibit in that mall.. its on display until april 30. its quite cool. check it out!