Thanksgiving In June

     After five months my shoulder has healed.  Baruch Hashem. I am so grateful on so many levels. As usual after going through a life challenge one learns a lot about a subject one never knew about before and had never wanted to know about before.

     I am grateful for the  emergency room I went to . They are amazing people. They do their jobs and make people who are scared and in much pain feel human and hopeful. I am grateful for my orthopedist for his expertise and for his upbeat personality. I am grateful for my physical therapist who helped me regain the use of my left arm. It was nothing short of miraculous to go from weeks of immobilization to full use of my arm. When one goes through physical therapy it can seem like one is climbing an endless mountain. Fortunately I have reached the top of the mountain. 

     I hope you never break a limb . It is painful in a way you cannot imagine unless you have experienced it. The flip side is now that I have broken a shoulder I realize how truly miraculous healing is.

     Wishing everyone continued good health .

     

The in Between

     I haven't had time off of work like this since my dad passed away almost 7 years ago. Being home due to an injury is different than being off for a  death in the family. I had always hoped I would have extended time off for maternity leave but alas life is full of surprises.
      It took me a little bit to be at peace with my situation. Bone healing takes time and nurturing. As much as I would like it to be healed yesterday I know it takes time.
      My favorite line people spout is to enjoy my time off. I don't miss work but I would not call having a fractured shoulder enjoyable. Its not the worst thing in the world but I would much prefer to have extended time off for a fun reason. Broken bones hurt and make it hard to sleep without waking up a gillion times.  For me an awesome vacation includes good sleeping. I'm also not such a homebody. I like being out and about.
     Its easy to get swallowed up by work responsibilities and forget to nurture one's social life . A shoulder injury is quite a reminder. Being social is important to well being as much as being able to afford one's life. Being social makes life worth living. Right now I'm not really social or working. I am speaking to good friends more often which is something I must continue once I recover. As much as I would like to socialize right now I really need to rest up. When I am all better I will be back on the merry-go-round. Some of my perspective has changed but so much is easier said than  done.

a matter of faith

a few years ago i read the book the spirit catches you and you fall down by anne fadiman. its about a child of Hmong immigrants in merced california who has epilepsy and the culture clash with the hospital , doctors and modern medicine. though they did not denounce doctors and modern medicine they had their own version of faith healing and rituals which they incorporated into their child's treatment. it was difficult to communicate with them even with a translator because there weren't words in their language to convey the western information that needed to be transmitted to them.
the title of the book is the Hmong definition of an epileptic seizure. to them it is like g-d is lifting them up and then lets go and then they have a seizure. the Hmong consider this to be very spiritual.
what really struck me as interesting in this book were the rituals the Hmong performed to help treat their child. they didn't make much medical sense which frustrated the medical professionals, but some of their rituals actually helped her, though they were quite unusual. ( unfortunately i read the book a few years ago so i don't remember exactly what they were).
this made me really think . because these people really had faith that their rituals would change their child's fate it did help her. it did not cure her, but the authorities all saw that this child was well taken care of and by her behavior was a child who was loved and knew how to love others. they also saw that ultimately the beliefs and rituals of this family probably did not make her any worse for wear if not maybe even better off.
this of course made me think a lot about the power of faith and prayer. does prayer work proportionate to how much a person believes in it, or does it work because it works? i have heard that a patient will heal quicker if he has confidence that his doctor will cure him. on the other hand , i have heard that if someone prays for someone else, even if the person doesn't know about it they will (or it will help) them get better. perhaps it is only crucial for the person doing the prayer or ritual to have faith in what they are doing .
i prefer to believe that prayer does help and that it is real. we don't always get want we ask for, but i think that it is important to ask anyway. perhaps prayer is meant to be a lesson. we pray to get want we want. it is important to ask for what we need in life even if we may not get it. the point is not whether we get what we need and want but that we try . also, the more that we believe in change, hope and recovery the more it will happen.