You Can't Win

      Facebook can be good and bad. You have more access to more people than a dating website and yet someones profile can be just as off putting as a dating website profile. Someone that is a friend of a friend contacted me. He is definitely not for me religiously but that was not the disturbing part. He had photos of himself with women he had gone out with. Though he himself was OK looking the women he dated were twos on a scale of one to ten. I am embarrassed to say that it really bothered me that someone I do not even know who I am not interested in went out with some unattractive women and it made me even less interested in him. I guess its because if someone I did not know sees my picture and then is interested in me it means he thinks that I am attractive as my facebook profile is closed the only someone really sees is what I look like. He sends me a message saying he thinks I'm really pretty, but what does that mean? I see what he finds attractive and pretty to him means nice personality or smart. The crazy thing is this bit bothers me more than the fact that even if he usually dated better looking women he would not interest me. You can't win.

Candy Crush

      For about a year I was a candy crush addict along with several of my Facebook friends. Eventually I broke free from my addiction. I still have Facebook friends who are candy crushing including several in Israel. I imagine they are in the rocket shelters playing candy crush. I bet Mark Zuckerberg did not envision Facebook games as a diversion during war in Israel but I think he would click the like button if he knew .

Facebook Dislike

          One of the most enjoyable parts of Facebook is catching up with old friends. One of the most disturbing parts of Facebook is seeing how badly some of my friends have aged. I recently looked up my best friend from nursery school on Facebook. Bad move. She looks really old. Mind you I haven't seen her that much since I was about six, but still. There are no two ways about it . She has aged. Granted so have I , but I don't look as old as she does. Maybe its best to have my Peter Pan syndrome shaken but its  still. downright depressing. Sometimes its best to leave well enough alone. I'd rather remember some people as they were and not as they are now. Granted , one has no control over who one might run into in person or who one will see a picture of in the  newspaper, but Facebook and the internet in general make it more previlent. Sometimes technology isn't better.

Life is Strange

     The other day I was trolling facebook and looking up acquaintances. I saw the picture of someone I knew  a long time ago. I thought she was happily married. Lo and behold she has an open profile and I see a recent picture of her having a divorce party.
      Who needs tabloids like the National Enquirer? Juicy gossip is all over facebook. Then again, some things are better left unknown. My friend who is now divorced got married young to a guy who loved her even though she was very heavy. His mom was very heavy so he liked big women. I had always thought that this was so sweet. When I saw them together there was so much love. It helped me believe that men have different views on who they find attractive . Then again they had been married for many years and have a daughter. I don't know what really happened. Then again, sometimes its comforting to know that even when you think someone has a perfect life maybe it isn't perfect after all. Sometimes things start out great and then things don't always continue that way. I sadly admit that sometimes misery does like company, if maybe just a little bit.
       
     
       

Facebook and Dating

          I am always wary of becoming Facebook friends too quickly with someone I am dating. I know that this sounds strange because this is someone who has my phone number and knows where I live yet I am slow to friend them on Facebook. If it doesn't work out then what? When is it proper to defriend them on Facebook? Usually I am fortunate and they defriend me . I say that this is fortunate because the same guys who defriend me on Facebook would have been gravely offended had I defreinded them first.
            Then there are the exes who never defriend me on Facebook. I usually limit their access to my profile, status updates, etc, but still I would prefer to defriend them . But I don't . Its easier not to.
              These are the thoughts that make me nostalgic about the days before Facebook. 

Facebook

     I miss the days when a person could end a friendship by slowing drifting away from them. I miss when ending friendships did not have to be so official. Like the days before facebook. Now when you drift out of friendship from someone you have to wonder when it is okay  to remove them from your facebook friends list. Or is it ever okay? When they defriend you on facebook it feels bad, but you already weren't friends for a long time. So why does it even matter? Before facebook breaking up a friendship did not have to be so official.

Hasidic Boy wins Chinese Dance Contest

   This is really funny! I just saw it on facebook tonight. Matisyahu eat your heart out.

sad but true

I found this gem on facebook and I just had to share.

needs no explaination

this  picture made me laugh.

shavua tov

i  will wish you a shavua tov with this fabulous proverb that i stumbled upon on facebook. "i'm sorry if the middle of my sentence interrupted the beginning of yours"

Evil Facebook

Lately there has been a lot of hullabaloo about banning Facebook and the Internet by some charedi rabbis as well as high schools.i for the most part tune these tidbits out like white noise but there was one tidbit that really tickled my funny bone.the chachmah was that one shouldn't go on Facebook because one might have an affair. I would assume the rabbaim are referring to married people going on Facebook. I for one am single and can barely get a date from Facebook yet the rabbaim are worried that the married people are having extra marital affairs via Facebook .i think that married people who are on frumster as well as
Jdate and Facebook are probably more successful at finding dates than singles are on these sites. If you are looking for trouble you will find it . News flash , people were having affairs way before the Internet and Facebook existed.

facebook follies

i joined facebook for the events . yes i am constantly checking status updates , posting photos and instant messaging  but really i just joined for the plethora of singles events posted . now that fb exists no one gets conventional e-mails about events so i just had to join. oy the peer pressure.
my most favorite part about seeing posted events is checking out the guest list. you just know that half of those people on the guest list are not attending because in a few days when the event posts photos you don't usually see half the people who say that they are attending. this can be good , this can be bad depending on who on the guest list you do or don't want to see at said event or even in photos.( yes there are some people i don't even want to encounter even in a photograph)
even if they make people pre-pay for an event one still doesn't really know who is truly on the guest list. as the saying goes... "just clicking attending on fb does not assure one's spot at the event. one has to register on the link" which is usually off  facebook.
i do miss the good old days of just asking the event organizer who was attending the event before actually signing up. there were no guest list guarantees then either , but it didn't indulge any one's inner stalker either.
now when we attend singles events not only do people look vaguely familiar because we may have seen them in person we now may have seen them on facebook  as well.  when someone uses the pickup line "haven't i seen you somewhere?" they aren't completely lying. they probably have seen you somewhere before, but that somewhere was most likely  virtual.

good friends

to have a good friend is so important. knay lecha chaver. buy yourself a friend. interesting.

its so important to have a friend that the torah even tells us to buy one. that said , a true friend is hard to find and even harder to buy.

on facebook one could have five hundred friends and what does that all mean? NADA! how many of these so-called friends would you really want to spend time with? how many of these folks would you even be in contact if not for facebook? on the one hand its nice to be in touch with alot of friends from the past, but really? where is the substance?

some friends are situational friends. when the situation is over you are no longer friends. no longer single no longer friends. no longer in high school/college/neighborhood no longer friends. its not a bad thing. there isnt enough time in the day to keep up with so many people.

how many people do you think really know who you are? not how many people think they know you.

how many people really know you and like you for who you are? probably not many. i know there arent many who really know me. there are a few. but not alot. alot of people are too selfish to really get to know anyone besides themselves. alot of people dont really care. others arent capable of understanding another person. no frame of reference. if you arent exactly like them they cant understand you.

thankfully i do have several people who do really know me. and that actually is alot. its not often to have even one person who really knows you. fortunately i have several . life is good.