Heartbreak

After the October 7 massacre in Israel I have not been able to get my thoughts together. There is so much to say and its hard to know where to start. I am so disturbed by the brutal massacre and mutilation as well as heartbroken by the abduction of 250 civilians. I lived in Israel for 2 years after high school. I went to a girl's yeshiva . Though it did not make me want to immediately make aliyah, it did give me a strong bond to my Jewish homeland. A few things have really stood out about Israel that have stayed with me for all of these years. In Israel there is a deep respect for older people . When I was eigtheen and went on buses in Jerusalem, if you did not stand up and give your seat to an older person there was someone religious or secular telling me to give them my seat. I have NEVER seen this anywhere else. On Israeli independence day everyone you knew or did not know would bop each other on the head with baby toy hammers. Not sure if this is still a tradition, but it was years ago. In what other country would this happen and you would not be afraid? None I have ever heard of. It was amazing to be in Israel and see Rachel's Tomb, Masada, Maarat Hamachpelah, and the kotel. All of these places I had just learned about in school had came to life. Machaneh Yehudah (the Jewish farmer's market) has the most incredible melange of produce and spices . I remember there being a pita bread oven on the premises that made the freshest most tasty pita bread I have ever eaten. When I lived in Israel it was before pita bread had been mainstreamed in the United States. Though I haven't visited Israel in years , Israel is still close to my heart. This is why what has happened there since 10/7 is most painful. I have friends and relatives who live in Israel. Watching people rip down the pictures of the Israeli hostages has been so upsetting. So many loveley people have posted pleas from their friends and relatives for their release. Many have postd videos of those who were taken hostage so we can get to know who they are. Others have posted memorial videos of those who were so tragically murdered. All of this makes me cry , but it also has made me feel closer to Israel. A few people have posted vigils of the hostage square in Tel Aviv where family members hold vigil for their loved ones who are being held hostage. The most touching is to hear them saying havdalah together at the end of Shabbos and seeing them sing shalom alechim by the Shabbat table set up for those who are held hostage. One can delude ones self living far from Israel that one does not know personally any of those who were taken hostage One of the shuls near me hosted an evening with two brave daughters of one of the hostages spoke. As it turns out one of the hostages from the Nova festival is the nephew of someone who was in my cabin in summer camp many years ago. He is also the cousin of a good friend I had when I was nine years old. I am praying for the end of this war, for peace , for the return of all of the hostages, the elimination of hamas and for peace and sefety for the Jewish people

Horton Hears A Who.

I have many thoughts and fears aboout the war in Israel. It was such a major shock to hear about it in shul on Shmini Atzeret. It made the yizkor service I participated in a bit more intense . Over the years the progessives have been getting more cozy to the anti Israel crowd .The last major confilict had a lot of protests in Manhattan which were chilling. This time around the casualties from Hamas were like a gut punch. There were even more people siding with Hamas but in the weirdest way. So many young college students are spewing such hatred but I get the feeling they don't really know what is going on they just have been told by the wrong people what side they should be on. They seem relieved they have someone they think they can safely hate. The irony is their hate for America has caused them to be on the side of people who would love to bring their downfall. People who hate the west and aside from hating Jews those they are siding with hate Christians just as much . These useful idiots don't realize they are joining a cause hell bent on ruining their way of life. Being Jewish I have been davening as much as possible. All of this that has been going on is a bit too apocolyptic to me. Its not that I am in complete shock its just that I was really hoping that the state of affairs the world is in now would not have happened . As a Jewish person I feel a lot like my community is whoville and we are waiting for Horton to help save us. Or I guess its just an analogy to wanting Hashem to save us. We have to do the best we can to save ourselves and our society but it feels so big and that only Hashem can truly save us. Despite every fear I have been having lately I am heartend by the brave people who have been exposing the names of the useful idiots who have been ripping down the posters of the kidnapped Israeli civilians. I am heartend by the brave souls who have confronted them . I am heartend by the young man who educates stuedents about how hamas doesn't have American liberal values and some of the kids would realize they aren't as informed as they thougt on this issue. Its bad that they have been indoctrinated but I feel that for many of these people its not too late to save them from the dark side. The truly wonderful thing that I have seen lately is the solidarity and unity of the Jewish people in NYC and arouhd the world . So many inspiring words have been imparted. So much love has been sent to our bretheren in Israel. So many beautiful rallies for Israel with so much emotion and love. So many pulling together in any way they can to help Israel. We Jews love life and I am proud to be part of a people who love life . I pray for peace and a victory for Israel , for the Jewsish people and for all good people all over the world .

The Future

Recently at work I had the least triggering conversation with co-workers in a long time. Each was showing pictures of their nieces and the baby fever was ignited. One wanted to supress the baby fever because she wanted to go to graduate school. Finally . Normal conversation. No politics, no disease talk. Just normal speak that could be discussed in any generation . I have hope for the future. Literally.....

Time Passages

Lately I have run into a lot of older people that I haven't seen in a few years and I have noticed how much they have aged. Some are losing their memoriesa , others have aquired difffernt disablitiles. It makes me realize how fleeting life is and how much it is important to appreciate what we do have when we have it . Sadly its hard to internalize because often we don't focus on a particular gift of human functioning until we lose it. I suppose general gratitude is in order, kind of like the simple morning prayers we say when we wake up. Its kind of crazy that we don't always internalize gratitude for ones general health until experience more of life, but better late than never.

Nostalgia

During all of the shutdowns of the past few years I have had a lot of time to peruse nostalgia groups on Facebook that look back at the 70's ,80's and 90's. They are a lot of fun to take part in . Random people post their old photos. It can be a guilty pleasure, but just for a little while. After a while it becomes a little depressing. Its fun to look back but not to just look back. A lot of the difficultly of the past few years is that so many people have been afraid to move forward with life. Life is full of change and as much as its important to appreciate and remember the past its so important to live in the moment and make more memories. Happy Thanksgiving 2022! Here's to making more memories and enjoying the present!

THREE MINUTES - A LENGTHENING [Official Trailer]

Several years ago I saw the documentary Three Minutes in Poland and read the book by Glenn Kurtz. Three minutes in Poland is a three minute home movie Glenn Kurtz's grandfather took when he and Kurtz's grandmother went on a European vacation in the summer o 1938 . I also have watched various YouTube videos about Kurtz meeting one of the people who was in this three minute film. Now there is a longer film about this home movie. When I heard that there was another documentary about this movie and that the producer and Kurtz would be at the showing for Q& A I quickly bought a ticket. I wasn't sure how much more there was to be added to the story but I was willing to check it out. So often when I see footage like this I feel like it spins so quickly and I am not quite able to take enough of it in. This new documentary makes sure that the viewer is able to take it all in and more. David Kurtz , the man who took this film was not a filmmaker . He had just bought the home movie camera a few weeks before his trip and he brought some color kodachrome film with him. As a result this is one of the few color films of its kind and the only one of its kind of the village of Nasielsk, Poland. What makes this film so beautiful is that you see the joie de vivre of these people. The film captures their personalities. Many of the kids who are filmed act really goofy which as it turns out was rather poignant. There is a woman chiding her daughter. There is what looks like a brother sister having a spat. Everyone seemed excited to see a video camera . There were touching moments between fathers and sons. The film played over so many times that I feel like I got to know these people. I got to see part of a world that was destroyed . There are a lot of unknowns about those in this film but there are also a lot of clues that can be revealed by what is shown . I have always thought that that G-d leaves us answers to so much in this world that can be figured out if one knows how to read the clues one is given. This film leaves more clues than first meets the eye. This documentary as well as the original 3 minutes of footage is a living memorial to the people in this film whose names we may never know . Often people remember faces better than names which is fortunate. These faces won't be forgotten .

Time

The world is so strange. A person is born into one era with parents,grandparents, siblings etc. And then time passes. Slowly grandparents pass on , neighbors pass on and the world slowly changes. The people who were once such large parts of our lives are no longer around and we are forced to live in a new reality a new world that some of our friends and family will never know and will never be a part of. Slowly the celebrities who had been so much of the culture age and others become the culture. Slowly the cultural icons pass on . New technologies emerge and one forgets that there was a way of life before these innovations. Sometimes when I think back to different times in my life and then for a moment I realize that not only are those times gone so are many people who were part of that memory. I could never go back to that time not just because time has past but also because those who were part of that memory have passed as well. As I get older it seems like there are fewer and fewer who remember the different worlds I have known throughout my life. Of course this is how life is. It is ever changing. Worlds are ending and worlds are emerging. Sometimes I wish time could slow down a bit so I can savor the good moments in life and spend more time with the people that I love. No one can stop the change of the worlds. All we can do is make the best of each world we get to participate in and know.