shared custody

its bad enough when i have a relationship which breaks up, but to be honest, its no walk in the park when this happens to my friends. especially friends who break up who used to be part of my chevra. who gets the friends? even a relatively reasonable couple who breaks up can make this transition difficult for the friends. like who do you hang with saturday night when each calls you up separately and wants t0 get together? of course there are always those who were friends with one party or the other to begin with and will stay friends with their pre-relationship friend. what happens when you were equally close to either party? then what? i abide by the policy of whoever calls me up first. of course this is always difficult because the second party might call me up with more appealing plans. previously it wouldnt have made a difference because if the second caller had a better plan we could have all done the second plan as a group. now its more complex . thats why i abide by my rule. otherwise things can get sticky. this gets easier, but it takes time. of course i do realize that its worst for the couple who has broken up. im just saying that the friends are like kids who now have to contend with a broken family of friends. and that ain't easy either.