i was talking to one of the "nerdier" types recently . i hate to label him as such. he really is a nice person even though i do not know anyone i would set him up with. anyway, he was telling me how he is still interested in my friend, but she doesn't give him the time of day. the sad part is he was so sincere that i really felt bad. it wouldn't help for me to intervene on his behalf because i know that she would not appreciate him or even appreciate hearing about his sincere interest in her. she would just think "oy why do only the nerds show interest in me?" so i won't bother irritating her. too bad though. its always nice to have an admirer even if its not mutual .
5 comments:
"Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary" :)
Does this theory work with woman as well? After a certain age what characteristics makes someone a bigger nerd than everybody else?
hmmm... well you are assuming that the nerdy guy was older. he is not. he is just a nerd. although i think that this particular nerd isnt interested in me because he probably thinks that i am too old even though i am younger than he is .and yes there are nerdy women that men try to avoid as well. i will say that judging by singles events that put the cap at age 40 but let their over 40 friends in anyway, being over 40 is the definition of being a nerd. they have to let you in if you are under 40 and are a nerd but if you are over 40 instead of saying you can't go because you are a nerd they just say you are over forty , even if by just one year , you can't get in. this applies more to men than women only because more men try to get into events aimed at pple younger than they are than women, but i have seen them tell nerdy women over 40 that they can't attend due to their age instead of nerdiness.
I think you've questioned before just how "popular" could a single be over 35. My question really was what do you think is the difference between people that are hitting on you, that you label "nerds" as opposed to everybody else that's attending these events. At this stage shouldn't woman forget about socially acceptable norms and take it upon themselves to introduce themselves to any guy that they are interested in. At the end of the day everybody is there for the same reason.
anon- i think that you know very well who a nerd is and who isn't and i do not think that it is productive to discuss and it is not the point.
i will answer your second question. time and again i have been to singles functions and introduced myself to someone i was interested. we may even have chatted for a lengthy amount of time, but really , men want to do the chasing and not the other way around.
there aren't really any shy men. if a guy is interested they will ask you for your number. if not he won't . time and again i thought that some guys were just shy and that is why they didnt ask me for my number but really they just weren't interested.
too many times i have initiated things and things did not work out because it wasn't the guys idea to begin with. he just thought i was interested so perhaps he'd give it a shot, but because it wasn't his idea in the first place it didn't work. and this isn't just something that happened to me. recently a guy i know dated a woman who chased him for over a year. she made all of the effort, he none. she kept pushing to get married, but in reality he didn't really want her in the first place . she wanted him and he just went along with it because he liked going out with someone.
a woman has to let the guy know she seems interested in him , but he has to pursue her. not the other way around.
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