Wednesday, August 5, 2009

flash without substance.

often when dating i find that who i think the person is initially does not match who they become once i get to know him. someone homely can become an adonis and a total hottie can evolve into ugly as sin. and of course there are many levels in between. often someone can sport a particular persona when in a group while one on one they can be the opposite. ive met alot of guys like this. at first they seem very convivial, and then you spend time with them and their true nature is that of a depressed dodo. there are alot of guys who have alot of flash without substance. they seem interesting, but after spending quality time with them i have found that they possess zero quality. once in awhile i find someone who is more solid. someone who has strength of character. the search continues!


Lvnsm27 said...

my search continues also

Yeshivish Atheist said...

While the "flash without substance" people are plentiful. There are "substance without flash" people as well.

I get what you're saying, and it's true from a guys perspective as well. The seductive girl with miniskirt who acts all nice and charming may have the flash(on so many levels), but when other areas are inquired, such as intelligence, personality, desire to build a family, etc.. they can usually fall short on at least one of those categories when you get to know them enough.

By contrast, the shy, quiet, somewhat nerdy girls may not have the flash, but they are extremely gifted in the areas mentioned above.

Interesting how the ones without the flash tend to be the ones with the substance.

frum single female said...

yeshivish athiest-
'interesting how the ones without the flash tend to be the ones with the substance'
my sentiments exactly!

Jewish Side of Babysitter said...

I've seen this too, that's why we can't judge people based on first impressions.

I actually used to think about this a lot, where I would wonder, would I want someone who I'm comfortable with, but yet comfortablity would lead to being embarrassed of them at some point. Or would I want someone who I look up to and respect, but yet loose the intimacy, where you can't tell them everything.

Moshe said...

Watch Winners & Sinners, Jackie Chan and Sammo Hung comedy, and it's all in there and a very funny movie. Available from netflix or find on torrents.

frum single female said...

i hear what you are saying. however, sometimes when ive gotten to know guys who seem a bit nerdy and they end up not being as nerdy as i had once thought. no matter who i end up with ,"nerdy" or not, he has to be someone that i feel i could tell anything to , otherwise i wouldnt want to be with him.