friends that end

when you're dating someone if it doesnt work out , you discuss it with them, you tell them its not working , or you at least figure it out if they never return your calls, or if they just never call you after your last date. usually there is some type of ending, be it clearly defined, or assumed.

when you 've had it with a friend of the same gender it becomes a whole other ball of wax.

one of the first seinfeld episodes tried to reconcile this issue. the episode was male unbonding which aired june 14, 1990. jerry had a childhood friend joel who he outgrew , but joel still kept trying to stay in touch with jerry anyway. at one point jerry tells joel that he thinks that "they should stop seeing each other" and that they have nothing in common anymore. this of course doesnt work. in the end jerry decides to suck it up and tolerate when joel calls him even though he doesnt want him to . its just easier.

i find this subject so difficult. usually when friendship drifts its mutual. its just run its course. sometimes once i get to know someone i realize that they annoy the daylights out of me. and then what do you do? my so- called friend asks me what they have done to fall out of friendship with me. what can i say? i dont really want to tell them. it will hurt their feelings. its just the way they are. im not mad at them at all. i just choose not to spend that much time with them anymore because my mental state depends on it.

im a pretty patient person, but sometimes my patience runs out. some people are so sensitive that i feel like being friends with them requires me to walk on eggshells. which is okay. but sometimes i go back to being just average and not so accommodating, and then these same gendered friends get offended. im just too stressed to be their friend. if they were a guy id just break up with them. no problem . and im a good breaker -upper. but with my female friends i dont know what to do. its much harder to move on . its harder to "break up" .