Monday, June 23, 2014

How Frum Would You Go?

      I have friends who were not exactly shomer shabbas who for their spouse became shomer shabbos. These were  people who had at one time been shomer shabbos. I suppose they felt they could go either way with it and found spouses who were shomer shabbos and decided to observe. I think everyone has mitzvos they are flexible about  though maybe not be  as drastic as shabbos or not shabbos? Maybe more like TV in the house or no TV in the house? Or for others cover your hair when married or not cover your hair  when married? Or wear a black hat or kippah srugah?
       I guess the real question is what mitzvah can you add that you can still feel true to yourself and not like you are being forced to do by someone else. Its not so much whether a mitzvah is important or not , its just what you think that you are up to doing it  for someone else . Its about being totally honest because otherwise you are lying to yourself as well as someone else. A great recipe for divorce court.
       Sometimes its easy to look at others and say " Gee I would not do that for someone else " But who knows. Maybe you would. Maybe that other person in your life would make it important enough to you. I know that does not sound like the best reason to do a mitzvah, but their certainly are worse reasons to do a mitzvah than for love or shalom bayis.
   
      

1 comment:

Wondering Minds said...

There are things I know I do, or don't do, that are likely to change with marriage.