Going it Alone

     I have been single my whole life so I guess I'm used to it , but there are some things that are just better done with another person. I always think about this when I buy a pint or quart of ice cream. If only there was someone else to share it with.  Jewish holidays are when I always think how nice it would be to be married. Going to comedy clubs, plays or movies are times when its preferable to go with someone else.
     I have lived alone longer than I would like to admit and I enjoy it. But sometimes when I have company  I kind of miss not having anyone else around when they leave.
       I suppose a roommate or friend can substitute when was needs company, but roommates come and go. Friends are looking for their own relationships. It would be nice to have the companionship and stability of a spouse even though that too is not always everlasting.
       Though it can be done, I don't think life is meant to be lived alone.

 

On Aging

     There are certain things that are a part of life. One of them is aging. When you are a kid your baby teeth fall out and your adult teeth grow in.  At a certain point people get gray hair, need reading glasses, wrinkle, get cataracts. Sometimes its comforting to know that some milestones are just a normal part of life and others times its not as easy to go with the flow. Its not as easy when it happens to you even when you logically know that its just a part of life. 

Festivus for the Rest of Us

      I always love how ethnocentric people who celebrate X-mas can be. They can barely fathom that anyone would not be celebrating X-mas . They think that you must feel you have to make sure you find someone Christian to celebrate it with because you must feel so left out. The truth is I have zero interest in 

X-mas. I love the crafts at the holiday markets in NYC, but the booths are heavily owned by Israelis, so I'm not sure you can fully count it as enjoying something X-masy. But the holiday itself holds none of my interest. I love the fact that all the Christians are scrambling to prepare for their holiday and I'm just preparing to have  a fun day off. Lets face it, I live in Brooklyn so all of the Jewish stores are open on X-mas anyway. Its just like any other day. And I get a paid day off. How great is that?

      I never liked people saying Chrismakkah  so this year we can thank Jerry Seinfeld for naming December 25 Festivus because that's what it really is. Festivas. I feel festive because I get a paid day off that is not a holiday . Its just a fun day . It is so festive to have off of work so the name Festivus really fits.

I Hate The Rain

      Some people like to listen to the patter of rain to help them fall asleep. Not me. Not only does the rain not promote restful sleep in my case it disrupts it. I dislike the sound of rain tapping on my air conditioner. I especially feel trepidation when it rains because I live on the top floor of an apartment building and years ago I had a leak and I always fear a return engagement. For those who are fortunate enough not to know it can take a while to be fixed even with the most conscientious  landlord. Rain may be essential to a vegetable garden but it not welcome as a leaky roof.

Jacob Ostreicher is Free

  

Sean Penn Continued...

    I am embarrassed to say that though I had heard about this case I did not follow it as well as I should have until I saw it  posted on  Rabbi Maryles's blog. After reading about what happened I was compelled to do some you tube research and read up about what happend. An innocent American  man was imprisoned in a Bolivian jail. I posted these congressional hearings because it was so unbelievable. It was riveting  to see former FBI agent Steven Moore's testimony as well as Sean Penn's. 
     I never realized how involved  Sean Penn is with humanitarianism and justice. I just always thought of him as an actor with a hobby of social action. Well, not anymore. I am in awe of his courage and strength and determination  to free Jacob Ostreicher from Bolivian prison. Sean Penn has performed the real life role of a lifetime and I for one will never forget it. 

Sean Penn

Congressional Hearing on Jacob Ostreicher

   I know that many of you do not want to watch a whole hour and 37  minutes of this but at least tune in at the fifty minute mark for former FBI agent Steven Moore's testimony .. It is riveting.  At the 29 minute mark Ostreicher's wife speaks and at the 40 minute mark his daughter speaks. I don't think you can watch this without kleenex   nearby.

Why the Internet is Amazing

     After enduring the infamous Rabbi Wasserman anti-zumba video debacle I am convinced that I am living in the coolest era. Now that there are shiurim are available online the rabbis who post them are going to have to pay attention to their online image. Before online shiurim a rabbi could only make a fool of himself in front of those who were in the classroom or perhaps whoever taped the shiur and lent it to a friend , now he can make a fool of himself in front of anyone with online access.Of course this could also mean that many rabbis won't allow their shiurim online for this very reason . I think that having shiurim online will encourage rabbis to actually pay more attention to what they say because if its posted online they will be held more accountable for what they are preaching. This actually is a good thing even though I am sure others will disagree. I think that online shiurim will give rabbis the opportunity to elevate shmiras halashon to the fullest extent which truly will be amazing. One can only hope.
   
    

Everybody Wants a Man

Charles Manson may be getting married soon but I'm not sure I will . An adoring 25 year old nitwit wants to marry Charles Manson. She wasn't even born when he committed murder. This just goes to show you that everyone wants a man . He may be a murderer but there will always be some moronic woman out there willing to be his wife. Sheesh.

You Can Never Go Home Again

     When I was eighteen I read a  book that was not necessarily that prolific, but one line in it was. The line that I found so true was  "You can never go home again". Once you stop living with your parents you can never go back to the way things were before. The older I get the more I realize that its true. This is not a bad thing. It is all part of becoming an independent person.
      Once you are able to support yourself and take care of yourself you can appreciate your parents on a different level. I for one appreciate my mother's cooking more now that I have to make food for myself. Once one does not live with one's parents it is easier to look at one's parents as people who try their best .
       I can never go home again but being with family is always heartwarming because it was my first home . They were the ones who taught me what home is.
      

All Grown Up

     As a kid I thought once a person hit 18 and left home they were a grown up. Little did I know that as an adult one may be considered grown up but one is  still growing.  Life is constantly evolving. At one point one thinks one has it all figured out and then time passes and one needs to re-evaluate. What once seemed right suddenly isn't. Life is a constant evolving journey. 

I am now Part of the Future

     For years I had worn contact lenses that you take out each night , clean and reuse for about a year. Eventually I went on to wear  two week contact lenses that you take out each night and clean and reinsert the next day. Finally they have created one day throw away contacts in my prescription. I feel like a new person. Now that tsa laws have gotten so complicated  it is nice not have to worry about travelling with contact lens solutions that fit into a one quart  sized Ziploc. It feels so decadent to toss out my lenses each night instead of adhering to a strict contact lens cleaning solution regiment. Its nice to be part of the future.

Hanukkah

          How many latkes have you had this Hanukkah? How many donuts? Is it possible to even keep track? I for one am not a jelly donut person. I am more of a latke person with applesauce and sour cream. I haven't had too many latkes  though. Yet.

Paths

Everyone has a different path. Sometimes the path does not turn out according to plan. Sometimes it ends up better than expected and other times one wishes it could have been different. The key is to be happy with whatever road life takes you down. Easier said than  done.

A Lovely Suprise

     I did not manage to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving parade on tv today, but I saw a posting on facebook  of the dreidel float spinning in front of Macy's toward the end of the parade.  I wish I could have seen it there live. Now I know that moshiach truly is on the way.

I

Happy Second Night of Hanukkah

Happy second night of Hanukkah!

Happy Thanksgiving and Hanukkah

     Happy Thanksgiving and Hanukkah! Its so fun to say. I don't especially like people combining the two holidays and calling it Thanksgivingkah, although its a step above Christmasakah since Thanksgiving is a secular holiday. 

      I am thankful to be living in the United States. I am grateful for the freedoms we have here that we do't even realize we are so fortunate to have. I am grateful to live in a country where I can openly celebrate Jewish holidays.

The Jewish Museum New York | Light My Fire: A Hanukkah App

The Jewish Museum New York | Light My Fire: A Hanukkah App    The Jewish Museum in New York has created the cutest app for iPhone and android. Its a Hanukkah app. You can choose a menorah which is a replica of a menorah from the museum. You can read about where this menorah is from. You can choose a location for the menorah to be lit and then you can virtually light the menorah on your phone. They even have the brachot listed on the app. Its  just adorable.

Happy First Night of Hanukkah

Happy first light and night of Hanukkah. Though I don't mind Thanksgiving sharing the spotlight with Hanukkah, I'm glad that Hanukkah gets to have the first night on its own. 

Uncertainty

      To live is to live in uncertainty. Everything that seems certain one minute can turn uncertain the next minute. All we know for certain is the present and that is only if we are truly self aware. To live with confidence is to live knowing that only Hashem knows what is going to happen  and to have faith that everything in life will be for the best.
      Easier said than done....

Chagall

      Living in the age of the internet is amazing. When you go to a  museum you can download a free app for the audio tour . You almost don't  have to go to the museum because there are thumbnails of the exhibit in the audio. Then again  nothing compares to experiencing  actual paintings.
      Yesterday I went to the Jewish Museum in New York city to see the Chagall exhibit. His more Jewish oriented works were there. Marc Chagall nee Moshe Segal was born in Belarus in 1887 . He later lived in France and due to World War II ended up in the United States. This exhibit has paintings he made in the 1920's to 1940's . Through his paintings he expressed his fear of impending doom on Europe's Jews in that time period. When one looks at a Chagall painting one really has to stand back and take it all in because there is so much imagery on every inch.
       There is one dark spot in the exhibit. Chagall had a strange interest in Jesus and liked to use Jesus imagery in his paintings to use him as a symbol of Jews. I realize that when one studies art there is a lot of Christian art involved, but it disturbs me that a Jewish artist who  escaped Europe during the holocaust would be so intrigued by  it and used it in his artwork. I am not sure if I can recommend this exhibit with a full heart because of this imagery. Its just a little much for my taste. Perhaps just download the Jewish Museum Chagall exhibit app and see for yourself  if it is worthwhile. 

More on Apologies

     Sometimes when someone continually does something disrespectful of others there is no place for a verbal apology. One just has to change their behavior and be a better person and MAYBE then they can be forgiven. Sometimes a person can just go too far in the bad direction and there is no turning back. 

Three decades later, the effects of synagogue shooting are still being felt

Three decades later, the effects of synagogue shooting are still being felt  Thirty five years after a white supremacist opened fire, killing one , and wounding two others outside of a conservative synagogue after a bar mitzvah  the man who did this was executed by lethal injection. This man did this purposely to kill Jews. He also was a racist serial killer who went out of his way to kill black people. He shot and paralysed Larry Flynt. This happened so long ago many may have forgotten about these crimes. Unfortunately John Paul Franklin got to live almost forty years longer than his victims had. I linked to an article from a few years ago to retell the story of hate that happened so long ago. Its important not to forget.... 

Thanksgiving and Hanukkah

     I love the fact that Thanksgiving and Hanukkah come out together this year. Its too bad that it doesn't happen more often.I think Thanksgiving and Hanukkah are a better mix than the usual Hanukkah / Christmas mix. Thanksgiving is a big holiday but its not religious so I like its pairing with Hanukkah.
     Sometimes Hanukkah is close to Thanksgiving- like the first week of December, but its not usually together like this year will be. Its kind of nice because there won't be work the first day of Hanukkah which will  be fun.
      I actually prefer when Hanukkah does not overlap with Christmas, but if it has to share the limelight with another holiday this year its best that it be with Thanksgiving. Every Jewish holiday is about thankfulness as in our survival as a people etc, so I think that its good that a holiday of hakaras hatov like Thanksgiving will be sharing a day with Hanukkah this year.

Beyond off the Derech

     Everyone always talks about those who radically fall off the derech. While there is always quite a bit to discuss about them  there are others who fall off the path more quietly. Some people start to lose their bearings while looking for their soul mate. They try every means of meeting their mate but still nothing seems to result in marriage. Slowly they become lax about shabbos. Suddenly they go from contemplating dating secular Jews to contemplating dating gentiles. Being an observant Jew is not a task meant to be performed alone. Sometimes there are those who become overwhelmed by the loneliness of being single and shomer shabbat. I myself can get overwhelmed but being an observant Jew is too much a part of me for me to abandon it. I have friends who are not so strong . This post is not about tooting my own horn. It is hard for me to give others chizuk when I understand very well what they are having difficulty with. In a way a lot of the outreach that is going on needs to be directed at singles because they are at great danger of being lost .Some kiruv organizations often ban frum singles from their programming but they are missing the point. These singles need kiruv even if they are "just" going to these events for the singles aspect. They could do a lot worse than finding someone less frum to marry.
       It is so frustrating to be single and religious especially as a woman. At thirty you feel like and old maid. Divorced men think you are selfish because you don't have children even though the only reason you don't have any is because you are single. In the secular world many say they don't want to marry unless they want kids (and even then they may not marry). In the religious world no one wants to marry a woman unless they think she can have x amount of children. I have friends who are starting to think that since they may be too old to have kids that they don't care if they marry someone frum or even Jewish. I am not condoning their thoughts but I can understand why their thoughts are going there.
       Perhaps the reason I have remained steadfast is that though I think that having children is for marriage I also believe that having children is not the only reason to get married. Getting married is about the two people building a life together, spending holidays together, growing together as people and spiritually. Its not that children should not be a part of this, its just that if it isn't it does not mean someone should not marry. Being alone for life is not a better choice. Giving up who one is spiritually should not be an option either.

Pigeon Invasion

     In case you do  not know I am not much of an animal lover. For about six months last year - from October to April - I had a pigeon living under my air conditioner. It was such an awful feeling.
     It all started out on Simchas Torah when I looked outside my kitchen window and I saw two pigeons sitting on the window ledge under my air conditioner. They may have been congregating there all summer but I hadn't heard them over the noise of my air conditioner. After Simchas Torah I noticed that they only left their post under the air conditioner on occasion to  forage for food.
      Both pigeons started out under my air conditioner during the hurricane but post hurricane only one remained. Thank goodness.
      I tried to get the super of my apartment building to put up bird spikes under my air conditioner, which he said he would do, but he never did . For six months I heard a pigeon cooing outside my window day and night. Sometimes it seemed it was actually inside my air conditioner. Thankfully one day right before Pesach I noticed that the pigeon was no longer outside my window. The invasion was over. I was blissfully alone.
       I even noticed that there were less pigeons outside on the fire escape this past summer. I don't know if it was just my imagination. Whatever the case, I am more at peace without knowing, seeing or hearing them around.
      

Too Special

     In the olden days when people used to make everything for themselves life was really simpler. You don't realize that many items in your wardrobe are unusual or custom sizes if you are making them yourself, you simply are making something that will fit . So often I have to go to stores with special sizes for items in my wardrobe. It is the biggest pain . Why must I be so special.? Its so much easier to buy things off the racks. 

      I have thick curly hair in a society of straight haired people, I have  high prescription contact lenses and glasses. I have sensitive skin. I require so many  niche purchases. I am always overjoyed when I find product

that can be purchased in a standard non-specialty shop . Its no fun being so special. Then again I bet I am not the only non-standard sized person out there. Yes, misery does like company.

Apologies

     I once  had a coworker  who would say that it was easier to apologize after doing whatever she wanted to do than it was to ask permission first.. Perhaps this is true, but some things aren't so easy to apologize for and it is much better not to do in the first place. Sometimes no amount of verbal apology will result in reconciliation.Sometimes rifts run too deep and some things cannot be undone. I think its better to be considerate of what one does and says . Life isn't a dress rehearsal.

Technology at its Best

 This product is all kinds of amazing. It will revolutionize the lives of the visually impaired. I have heard that the price is in the ballpark of $2,500 , which is a little pricey, but even that is a small price to pay for the service it gives someone.

Sleeping on the Q train....

Post by HuffPost Religion.

    Who hasn't done this? You get lulled to sleep by the rocking of the subway and suddenly your head is resting on someone else's shoulder. Its rather embarrassing, . But it happens daily. I love this photo. I just had to post this.

To Be Known For

  Lately I have been watching old reruns of the Mary Tyler Moore Show. The clip that I have included is the theme song from the show, but not the full visuals . This you tube clip only included the end of the theme song with Mary Tyler Moore throwing her hat in the air and a woman named Hazel Frederick to her left donning a scarf, glasses and a scowl. In Hazel Frederick's 1999 obituary there is mention of her having been the scowling woman in the opening theme song of the Mary Tyler Moore Show.
    Though I can be a bit of a trivia buff, this little tidbit disturbed me. Imagine the most interesting part of a person's obituary being that they were in the background of a television series theme song. Granted , the Mary Tyler Moore show had been a very popular television show, but still.
     To my knowledge I have never been accidentally featured in any television series theme song. If I ever would be I hope that fact would not be the most notable thing in my life for people to remember for generations to come. Hazel Frederick's story certainly is a cautionary tale .
    

Appreciation

     One often appreciates something when one does not have it anymore The elevator in my apartment building is being renovated and I live on the top floor. I always have appreciated the elevator, but now I appreciate it even more. It feels as though I am having an elevator fast. I am always considering my steps before I get to my apartment building. Not too many heavy bags. I take the bus from the train so I am less tired when I get home and have to climb the stairs. I'm not sure how the old people  or the disabled are faring. I am conserving how many times I leave my apartment daily. The trek up the stairs is grueling when I am tired. I don't know what people did before the days of electricity. I am glad I did not live in that generation. Its hard enough surviving my temporarily elevator-less building. 

Life is Strange

     The other day I was trolling facebook and looking up acquaintances. I saw the picture of someone I knew  a long time ago. I thought she was happily married. Lo and behold she has an open profile and I see a recent picture of her having a divorce party.
      Who needs tabloids like the National Enquirer? Juicy gossip is all over facebook. Then again, some things are better left unknown. My friend who is now divorced got married young to a guy who loved her even though she was very heavy. His mom was very heavy so he liked big women. I had always thought that this was so sweet. When I saw them together there was so much love. It helped me believe that men have different views on who they find attractive . Then again they had been married for many years and have a daughter. I don't know what really happened. Then again, sometimes its comforting to know that even when you think someone has a perfect life maybe it isn't perfect after all. Sometimes things start out great and then things don't always continue that way. I sadly admit that sometimes misery does like company, if maybe just a little bit.
       
     
       

The Process

     I never used to understand how fiction writers would say that they  write and see where the characters  take them . Though I do not write fiction  the  more I write the more I understand what they mean. I start out with an idea for a post and as I start to put my thoughts together I see what the points I have to make are  and after editing I realize that my post may have a different theme than I had originally intended. Funny how that happens.

On Akeidas Yitzchak

 This week's parsha was Vayera  which includes the story of Akeidas Yitzchak - the sacrificing of Yitzchak. As most of us , I remember learning of this as a child. I guess I wasn't as sensitive a child as I thought, or maybe the credit for this not bothering me as a kid goes to the rabbi who taught us this. I don't know. This shabbos I was able to revisit the mind of a child regarding Akeidas Yitzchak.
    I was at my friend's house this shabbos and her twelve year old daughter was very upset by the parsha. Me, not even remembering what the parsha was asked her why. She said that  Akeidas Yitzchak really bothered her. She could not understand why the idea of being willing to sacrifice one's child to Hashem would be an admirable thing. I paused for a moment and realized just how great a test Akeidas Yitzchak was to Avraham. Of course as an adult I understood how grand a test this was for him. He fathered Yitzchak at age 100. Even if 100 was like 65 at the time , 100 was still old to have a child . If I had a child at my age which is nowhere near  90 or 100 I could not imagine sacrificing them even to Hashem. Of course this is what made Avraham special. He would be willing to sacrifice the son he had in old age to Hashem. I think that the point of Akeidas Yitzchok is not only that Avrahm's faith was that great that he would do anything Hashem wanted him to  but also that Hashem would not really have him go through with it. Hashem would want us to feel we would do anything for him , but he would not necessarily want us to do anything (like sacrifice our own child) for Him. Its really quite profound.

Giving

     Whenever I  find  something that I think would make a great gift for  a friend or a loved one I buy it. Who knows if the same item will be available when I might specifically be looking for a gift for them. Its always most difficult to find a gift for someone when one is under pressure.
      Lately I have been less likely to wait for designated  gift giving times and decide to just give the gift when I find it.Why wait? Life passes quicker than one expects. Why not make sure one makes the time to give  to those one cares about? 

The Wanderer

In front of  FAO Schwartz on fifth avenue 

One of my most favorite things is walking around Manhattan by myself. Its not that I dislike walking with others, its just that I  really enjoy walking by myself. I like noticing the details along the way and snapping photos. Perhaps I would notice the details with another person by my side. Perhaps not. It does depend on who I walk with and if they are willing to stop along the way and take in the sights or if the destination is more important than the journey.

Idealism

     I always love listening to friends who are no longer frum talk about what they prefer about the frum world. Usually its quite telling as to why they left frumkeit. I have one friend who went the Lubavitch route but decided it was not for her. The restrictions of being shomer shabbat were too much for her ,but she still liked the concept of the rebbe. Another friend had been modern orthodox, but after years of remaining single watching her friends marry and have kids she decided  not to be frum anymore. When eventually she did have a child she debated over what school to send them to. She would say she could not justify sending her kid to a modern orthodox school,, but a more black hat type she could. Meanwhile her kid remains in public school. Nothing like that all or nothing attitude. My friend could have easily returned to being modern orthodox, but would never have been able to swing charedi so she figured she'd do neither. I think that many think that idealism is best done from afar. When it comes to appying ideals to one's life its another story.

Dror Yikrah

This just in from the Maccabeats. Have a great Shabbat.

Let's Make A Deal

  Recently I heard a radio interview of 92 year old Monte Hall the MC from the 1960s and 1970s game show Lets Make  A Deal. I found out during that interview that Monte Hall is Jewish. His father was a kosher butcher in Winnipeg , Canada. I had no idea that he was Jewish. The most amazing part of the interview was when Hall told the story of the man who made it possible to pursue his dreams.
      Monty Hall could not afford to go to college, so after high school he worked in his father's butcher shop.  29- year old business man saw that he had potential so he offered to help him go to school with three conditions. 1)  He would not tell anyone who was helping him 2) he must retain at least a B+ average, 3) one day the say for someone else. Monty Hall has put many people through college and he has raised a billion dollars for charity. One person stepped in and helped him and so many people's lives have been touched. Until today I had no idea. I just thought of Monty Hall as a game show host. He has been so much more. Who knew?
   
     

IPhone Fever

     A co-worker of mine was so psyched when she bought her new iPhone 5s that she made sure her outfit matched her iPhone case the first day she brought it to work. She is all of 33 years old.  I'm all for appreciating the little things in life but somehow I found this bordering on the ridiculous. I don't recall her dressing to match her iPad case when she purchased her iPad but then again maybe she had.

What's In A Name? Local Kosher Honey for the High Holidays

What's In A Name? Local Kosher Honey for the High Holidays 

 Behold, this is one more link  about Andrew's honey. 

Buzz, Buzz

Andrew Cote, Beekeeper -- PART 1 from THE NEX Andrew Cote, Beekeeper -- PART 2 from THE NEXT LIST on Vimeo.
T LIST on Vimeo.
     Its no secret that I like to go shopping at the  farmer's market in Union Square. For the past few years there has been a vendor called Andrew's  Honey.  When he first opened his booth he would give out samples of his honey. At his booth he has honey made in Brooklyn , Central Park , Manhattan , etc. At first I just thought it was just a gimmick until I realized the honey was actually made in these locations.
     Being the age of the internet I recently decided to google this beekeeper and I came up with these two videos. Its amazing how you run into people on a regular basis and you have no idea about their lives. So of course I decided to post these videos about Andrew the beekeeper.

Andrew and his honey

You Say Tomato

     Often at when I am at work seemingly  intelligent co-workers will ask me to pronounce last names of clients who have Jewish sounding names that I am so familiar with that I find it startling that they are asking me how to pronounce them. After being asked this so often I realized that its culture and not stupidity that inspires their question. When I look at some Latino, Chinese , Japanese or Greek names I am often not sure how to pronounce them but my multi-cultural co-workers are often  able to pronounce them . Its all what you are used to. I am used to pronouncing Jewish names, they are used to pronouncing names from other cultures.

Racism

     If you are part of the group that you are criticizing is it still considered racism if you make a demeaning remark? Specifically, is it racist if someone Jewish speaks about Jewish people in a way that a gentile would be accused of being anti-semitic? I really hate it when someone Jewish says something really derogatory about Jewish people and they preface their comment with " I can say this because I'm Jewish. " Well , if you ask me its still wrong . Though its not as bad as if someone gentile would spout epitaphs, it is still not ideal for Jewish people to bash Jewish people and I do find it offensive unless its constructive.

Two Sides of the Same Coin

     I admit it. I like romantic comedies that are the epitome of chic flicks. A lot of my male friends really like action movies with little plot.  Though many including myself will argue that romantic comedies always have the same plot and the same ending, I will argue that action flicks always leave out the plot and always have the same ending. Women like romantic comedies because they always have the same plot and ending. Men enjoy mindless action flicks because they are plot free. Really romantic comedies and action flicks are two sides of the same coin. Both are genres that are dependable. You watch each  genre and you get the same expected feelings afterward. There is something comforting about that.

Hot Stuff

   This is the season of the hot pepper. I am not a fan of food that burns my mouth but these peppers do look quite elegant .
    If for some reason you are brave and decide you want to try eating one of these make sure you wear gloves when you slice them . Also be sure not to touch your eyes as they will sting .
     Once I cut jalapeno peppers without gloves. When I removed my contact lenses it really burned . I had to put my contacts through about three rounds of clear care solution to get them back to normal.

Sukkah in Union Square

The Chabad sukkah in Union Square this year was unique. They decorated the outside in  a funky cool design. It was the most creative sukkah I have seen this year.  Unfortunately right next to the sukkah the hare krishnas were dancing and singing. It was surreal. I felt bad for the Chabadnicks who were trying to get people to bentsch lulav and esrog  or to say a bracha in the sukkah.

 I took a lot of pictures of the outside of the sukkah because I thought it was such a fun sukkah. I could not decide which pictures I liked best so I posted most of the pictures I took.

Sukkah City Union Square 2010

This is footage from the Sukkah City competition in NYC in Union Square in 2010. What is interesting about this video is that many of those who are speaking are creators of the sukkahs that were in the competition.  . This second video really captures what it felt like to browse the city of sukkahs  in the competition.

Sukkah City The Documentary.

   Tonight I saw the documentary Sukkah City at the JCC in Manhattan. It was screened for free in Union Square on Sunday night but I unfortunately I had other plans so I missed joining the 400 people who were there for the screening . I hate crowds  but it would have be cool. It was pretty cool to see it at the JCC tonight. Th filmmaker Jason Hutt was there as well as Danny Passow the rabbi who who Joshua Foer consulted for the competition and Henry Grossman  1/2 of the creative team of Henry Grossman and Babak Bryan who created the winning sukkah called Fractured Bubble.

fractured bubble

 Sukkah City was the brainchild of Joshua Foer who wanted to raise awareness of what a sukkah is by creating a competition for architects to use the biblical parameters to create a winning sukkah. Twelve of these sukkahs were to be displayed in Union Square and the those who  viewed the sukkahs would choose the winner.
  Jason Hutt's documentary covers the competition from start to finish. He interviews the contestants as well as the jurors who chose which sukkahs to include in the Sukkah City display in Union Square. He also shows footage of the eclectic mix of people who viewed the city of sukkahs in 2010.,                            Many of the contestants were architects who never actually built anything they had designed so it was enjoyable for them to actually create their designs.
     Though they had been instructed to create sukkahs that were halachacally correct most of the sukkahs used the guidelines loosely.
    I found it quite enjoyable to listen to what the largely gentile contestants thought about making sukkahs and how serious they took the challenge. It was equally enjoyable to see the jurors choose the sukkahs . One sukkah that was excluded from the competition was one that would have made the Union Square subway stairs into a sukkah. The designer had proposed to put schach across the handrails of the subway station to create a sukkah. It would have been cool, but as in the movie 12 Angry Men,there was one person who objected and a lot of lively discussion which ended up excluding this sukkah from the mix.
      At the  end of the film they showed the reactions of many of those who viewed the display  of sukkahs which included Dr. Ruth Westheimer. My favorite sukkah viewers were the little boys who brought tape measures and analysed whether or not they thought the sukkahs were kosher.
     I had been one of the many viewers of those sukkahs. I think that it was an amazing project. The project made so many aware of what a sukkah is . It was funny to see what the designers  created and how different they were from any sukkah I have ever visited, but I looked at them as art and no one was going to actually use one for the Sukkot holiday .
     The documentary was informative and captured the spirit of Sukkah City the event. It will be shown again tomorrow night at the JCC in Manhattan.

Danny Passow, Jason Hutt, Henry Grossman

timeless

DIY Pumpkin Latte

   Since last year I have been making the best pumpkin lattes courtesy of Hungry Girl e-mails. I will share the link to the recipe with you. hungry girl pumpkin latte  Its amazing. Try it. Now.

Sukkos Greetings

     I am really enjoying this Sukkos. The three days of Yom Tov and Shabbos did not drag on endlessly as it sometimes does. It was wonderful to get together with friends for meals and chat with friends on Ocean Parkway knowing that there was nothing but Yom Tov and Shabbos on the agenda for three days. 

     It is so important to savor these holidays because as soon as they  are over  its back to full weeks of work.

Mad Mentsch

This is a little hokey but I thought I would post this anyway. Enjoy.

Beaming

      I often wonder what would happen if someone had an evil plot and decided to beam subliminal messages to people's cell phones or tablets. Or perhaps someone already is and we don't even realize it. People are that connected to technology they may not even realize they were being brainwashed.
       If you watch this you tube video it almost looks like the brainwashing has transpired. People are communing with their phones more than with humans. Thank goodness for Shabbos and Yom Tov when I am forced to disconnect from technology and reconnect with humans.

Anti-Semite finds out he is Jewish

    I just found this on facebook and I had to post it. It boggles the mind. 

Age Matters

      There is so much emphasis on looking young and being young in this culture that we sometimes forget that there is value with age. The thing that few people  tell you is that with age one gains insight about life that one does not get from anything but from having lived a bit. This is only a plus. I was fortunate to have someone actually tell me this years ago. Of course at the time I thought she had three heads. But this acquaintance at work told me that she was happy to be the age that she was and that she finally felt confident and comfortable with her lot in life. At the time I hoped that when I would be her age that I would feel the same. I am not yet the age that she mentioned, but I now I see a little bit more of what she meant. I too am more comfortable with who I am and who I have become than I was in my twenties which helps make up for the fact that I'm not actually in my twenties .
     When I was younger I would listen to adults talk about different time periods in their lives nostalgically and I could not exactly relate to it. Now I can and its not all bad. Its fun to be part of the youth culture of the day, but its also nice not to have to worry about always keeping up with it because you know that today's trends are the not too distant future's glamour don't.
      Decade to decade attitudes change as well as fashion. One really has to find what one is comfortable with and stick with it. The pop philosophy and attitudes  of the day will always change. It does not mean that you have to.

Types

     There are two kinds of people- those who are what you see is what you get and those who you have to get to know. I'm not exactly sure which type I am but I suspect is that I am more the type you have to get to know . I am fine with that. Years ago I had found this frustrating .Sometimes what is so apparent about some is so abhorrent that it would be better if it was more hidden. Then again maybe it's better that way. Sometimes when you get to know someone it gets better sometimes its worse. It's all about being willing to make that journey.

Jerry Lewis and The Jazz Singer

 I have been looking for this version of The Jazz Singer for years. I should have looked at you tube sooner. Dov Bear posted this on his blog, so I had to post it here. Its post Yom Kippur, so its quasi appropriate. I still think that the original version with Al Jolson was the best version of The Jazz Singer.

Smart Ways to Live

I thought that this was a  really cute video with a message of positivity before Yom Kippur. 

Google Rosh Hashanah

I realize that Rosh Hashannah  5774 has passed, but I did not get a chance to post this before Rosh Hashannah, so I am now

Patriot Day 9/11/13

     When I opened my calender to September this year I noticed that September 11 is now called Patriot Day. I am not sure exactly why, but it will always be merely 9/11 to me.
       It has been 12 years since one of the most horrific tragedies in my lifetime. It was the first day in my life when I experienced lack of appetite. And yet , life has moved on.
       On 9/11/01 it had seemed like time had stopped. I woke up 9/12/11 and wondered what next? Could life ever go on normally again? I went to work the next day and realized it could except for the fact that no one could stop talking about what had happened the day before.
     September 11,2001 was an extraordinarily beautiful day. The day before it had rained non-stop, which accentuated just how sunny and beautiful September 11 was. It just goes to show that just as tranquility does not always prevail on  a sunny day, tragedy does not always occur on a rainy day. Attractive people aren't always kind and less attractive people sometimes are more genuine.
      I cry for the families who lost loved ones during the attacks. I cry for the loss of our collective innocence.
      May we be inscribed for a year of peace, health and harmony.
     
      

These are my People

 I was so happy to see this Marc Jacobs ad. As a curly haired woman I can tell you that you almost never see this many models with this type of curly hair in a picture. These are my people. The women with the uncontrollable curly hair.Thank you Marc Jacobs. Shana Tova Marc Jacobs.  You made my day.

Shanah Tovah

     It's hard to believe that another year has come and gone. But it has. So much to do. So little time. Wishing everyone a happy and healthy new year.
      There is still time to reach one's goals but it may not be this year.

Honesty

     Being frum is not about compartmentalization. Its a way of life. I think that often people forget this . Hence the recent ponzi schemes perpetrated by frum Jews. Yes, I will call them frum Jews. They probably are very makpid on kemach yoshon and would never consider relying on the Flatbush eruv. They just are able to compartmentalize their frumkeit into one  basket and their business mores into a different basket.
     Rosh Hashanah is upon us. It is a time to reflect and resolve to do better next year. Of course those who really need to be listening to this are not reading blogs, but I will continue anyway. It is time to be careful in business . I have seen too many very frum looking people trying to take advantage of weaker trusting people in business. It makes me sick. Frum people are not the only ones who do this, but that is not justification. If people paid more attention to being honest in business than in the measurements of women's clothing  we would be living in a better world. Maybe then mashiach would come.

Disappointment

     Sometimes people are not able to be who you want them to be no matter how much you may want them to be. It is always so disappointing to find this out. Sometimes people set out on a destructive path that spins out of control . They are the only ones who can dig themselves out of their mess. No amount of sadness on my part will change them. It is moments like this that force me to move on .

Time Keeping

     I own several watches. Because I work full time and am on a tight schedule most of the time my left wrist sports a watch. I wear a watch not because I want to  but because I have to. These days its not quite as bad to forget to put my watch on since I own a cell phone which  has a clock .I should really stop wearing a watch on days I am not at work and just really on my cell phone clock.
     Whenever I wear a watch I feel obsessed with keeping track of time. On days I do not wear a watch I feel much more relaxed. I don't squander time but I am less fixated on the passage of time. Its important to be aware of time but not so much that one is not able to enjoy the moment. I often feel that sporting a watch makes it harder for me to enjoy the moment.

 

Its that time again....

It seems far too early to be posting Rosh Hashannah videos, but here it is. This is a cute one. 

The Uninvited

     Simchas can be joyous. The also can be great windows into seeing who your true friends are as well as how gracious one is .
    Recently I was not invited to a co-worker's wedding. Everyone else at the office  was invited. We worked together for years and were friendly. Even if I had been invited I would not have been able to attend. The wedding was on Shabbos. The best part of not being invited is that I feel zero obligation to buy her a wedding gift. Had I been invited I would have . If she had invited me it would just have been an invitation for a gift since I would not have been able to attend. Even though I know all of this I still feel a pin prick bad about it.
     Once I had  a friend who made a simcha and later told me that she was sorry but she had forgotten to invite me. I  did not forget to not get a gift for it. This of course was months after the simcha. I actually had known about it prior to her telling me because someone had mentioned to me that she had attended it. I think that that person had thought I had been invited but just did not attend. I of course said nothing. If someone does not invite me it says something about the friendship but there is really no need to discuss it . I may think that I should have been invited but apparently they hadn't . End of story. I certainly do not want to force anyone to desire my presence at their simcha.

Blog, Blog, Blog

      I have heard people say that Facebook has blown out a lot of the steam from blogs. Perhaps. But I still like blogs better. Or actually, I think that each has its own purpose. Though I post some of the same things on Facebook as I do on my blog, I don't write anything meaningful on Facebook. I save that for my blog. Most people are just looking to keep up with friends on a topical level on Facebook. If I want to connect to the world at large I post on my blog.  One can connect to more than just ones own social circles on the blogosphere.

Illusions

One of the hardest things to internalize is that everything is not always what it appears to be. I always try to think of this in terms of pictures. These pictures were taken in Times Square. It looks like the american flag is in the window of Starbucks. It is really is a reflection from across the street. One would never know this by just looking at these photos. Of course one clue would be the fact that the stars are on the wrong side of the flag . I guess that's how life often is. Things may really appear to be one way but there is often one little clue that gives you a hint that what you see isn't really straightforward

The Past

      Sometimes its hard to believe that life happened before I was born. I have parents, grandparents and friends who can verify that history is real, but still, its hard to fathom. Its also hard to grapple that those much younger than me do not remember much of what I remember growing up. It makes sense though. They were not born yet. What makes this all the more interesting is that if I have trouble believing the validity of the recent  past and I actually know people who lived in it, what about people of the future? How will they believe that what happened in our times really occurred?

Karma

     Every so often I go for a  medical test and invariably the same technician administers the test. I don't especially like her , but over the years I have gotten used to her. No matter what time of the day I schedule the test, she is the administrator. Last year I lucked out and there was a different technician. I attributed my luck to having switched office locations to have the test done. This year I pushed my luck. I went to the alternate location hoping my usual technician would not be there. Alas, I was not surprised when you know who came to get me in the waiting room. I could change the medical group that I have this test done, but just my luck this woman would end up working there the day I would book my appointment.
     I usually do not pay attention to medical technicians. The only reason I had remembered this one's name is because I so disliked her at so much during our first encounter that I wanted to remember who not to ask for to work  with me the next time. When the next time arrived I figured that enough time had passed and usually I never get the same technician for testing so I didn't specifically request not to work with her.. Boy was I wrong. The second time I worked with her fortunately  was a lot more favorable . The rest is history.

Silver Lining

   The good part of being really stressed out is that the usual little annoyances in life don't annoy me. Unfortunately when things are more relaxed I tend to focus on those same annoyances I ignore when life is crazed. I need to try harder to block out those annoyances when life is more chill . 

Satisfaction

     Birthdays are always a time when people re-examine their lives. Am I closer to my goals than I was last year? No, today is not my birthday. It is the birthday of a good friend of mine, thus the introspection.
      It is so easy to look back at the year and feel an aura of dissatisfaction. One is still single, may never have children, may never be independently wealthy. The list goes on. If ruminating about what one lacks propels a person to improve one's lot then ruminating can be positive. If it just sinks one further into a pit of self pity then ruminating is counter-productive. Perhaps it would be better to  try and identify what is good in one's life and try and appreciate.   If one is healthy, bask in this. Does one have solid friendships, and/or family who one mutually loves, cares and respects? These are all vital ingredients to existence on planet earth. Cherish them.
       Do you make time for the things that are important to you? If so appreciate this. If not try to make time for them.
       No matter how wealthy a person is one always wants more. Appreciate what one does have. I used to live in basement apartment. I had a friend who visited me and  disparaged me for living there. At the time it was all I could afford and I was satisfied living there because the rent was reasonable and I was able to do everything I wanted to because I had such low rent. Until she  brought it up I felt just fine about it. Don't let others drag you down.
       The quickest way to wealth is to appreciate what one has. Life is a process. Being satisfied with one's lot is not a cop-out. One can strive for one's goals while being satisfied with what bounty one has. It is always best for striving to start at point of strength rather than weakness.
      

Noise

     I don't know if its age or just my aggravation level, but New York seems a lot louder lately. It makes me feel like I'm ready to move to a quieter environment. I love the energy of NYC, but I am finding it a bit overwhelming . The other day a summer camp was aboard a subway car I was in. The noise level was so loud that  I began to understand why road rage exists. I of course changed cars at the next stop to gain some serenity.
     Every coffee shop I enter is blasting with  music. I can't read and drink in peace.
      I'm going away for Rosh Hashannah, unfortunately its not soon enough.

When Comedy Went to School

I saw this movie last night at the JCC in Manhattan. It was a lovely homage to  the birth of stand up comedy and the Catskills. Afterward there was a Q& A afterward

with the filmmakers and Jerry Stiller.
      The film explained to the average person who is not familiar with the Catskills and the borscht belt that the the beginnings of stand up comedy started there. A lot of frum Jews still go to the Catskills every summer, but the true heyday were the 1930's to the 1960's .
       Robert Klein is the main narrator . Jerry Lewis, Larry King, Sid Caesar, Jerry Stiller, Mort Sahl , Jackie Mason, Buddy Hackett's son,  and a few other comedians whose names I am not familiar with were interviewed. Buddy Hackett, Lenny Bruce, Mel Brooks, Alan King , Don Rickles , Carl Reiner, Totie Fields  and Eddie Canter were also featured.
      The 1930's - 1960's was a time when Jewish people went to the Catskills with their single children and tried to find them a Jewish spouse there. Jerry Stiller said that he and his wife were actually not so welcome to perform there at that time because they were an intermarried couple.
      Though the stomping ground of comedians today is not the Catskills, there still are a lot of Jewish comedians. Comedy is about words and putting words together and timing. Jewish people have a knack for just that. Also  as the film suggests , with one of our forefathers named Yitzchak  whose name means he will laugh, why wouldn't Jews be good at comedy?

The Real You

      When I was a kid I grew up with three lively brothers and a much younger sister. When I went to school kids who were in one of my brothers' classes would tell me that he was so quiet. I was dumbfounded. Were we talking about the same person?  It was at that point that I realized that people are often different in a crowd than they are one on one.  This especially applies to dating.
        There are many men who seem very outgoing in a crowd but when you get to know them outside of the crowd they are more reserved . I have dated  men who seem much quieter but once you get to know them they have quite a bit to say. This makes it difficult when people set others up on dates.                                    I am sure all of this applies to me as well. I may seem different when someone meets me than after one gets to know me . Then again, if someone reads my blog and knows me in person they probably know me pretty well.

Sleep

     When I was a kid staying up all night was one of my biggest goals. I would go to slumber parties and stay up all or most of the night . It was the best even though when I would get home from them I would sleep the rest of the day. Now I'm an adult and sleep is like candy. I can never get enough. I know that I have been writing a lot about sleep deprivation because it is something that I am working on . I have not reached my goal yet but I am on my way. It has definitely helped my weight loss efforts. I lost two pounds last week.
    

Rick Moranis' Mother's Brisket

This is really funny! 

On Alzheimers

     Alzheimer's is  a horrible disease. I suppose the only good part is that they can forget a lot of life's awkward moments that most of us without Alzheimer's would like to be able to remove from our consciousness.
      The other day I met someone whose mother unfortunately has Alzheimer's and is eating too much because she forgets how much she has eaten and just keeps eating. That was something that I had never considered. 

Jewish Garment Worker

I have photographed this sculpture before but I have never gotten this close before. I hadn't realized how uncanny the expression on his face is. It is so surreal.

Celebrities are People too

      Lately I have been listening to podcasts of minor personalities . A common topic is whether or not they read comments on their websites , twitter or facebook pages. Often they do not because some people can be really obnoxious. Not that I never thought that people of celebrity or personality  status had feelings, but I just figured that they thought it was par for the course and did not take the haters seriously. After  reflecting about this issue I realized it made sense. Celebrities are just flesh and blood like you and me.
       I have noticed that  many bloggers have a short sentence about being polite or respectful above the comments section. I think that when things are online and anonymous people think that they can say anything that they want  even if it would torment the person they are sending the comment to. A few years ago I had a very rude commenter so now I have comment moderation. That got rid of the troll. I guess once you have comment moderation you know you have arrived. Until then I hadn't needed comment moderation because I didn't get that many comments anyway. It was kind of a shame  that I had to resort to moderating. Its just that some of the comments made me feel too bad or were inappropriate so I had to moderate. I publish most comments , its just that it helps keep the obnoxious people out .
       Your mother was right. If you don't have anything nice to say , don't say it.